This was my crazy Twitter rant from the other day. Thought it was funny enough to turn into a post...
Blessed are the departed,
for they are no longer graduate students.
Dare not let thy heart be consumed with darkness,
for on the seventh day, they shall arise agin as postdocs.
They shall endure much suffering and persecution.
The faculty search committee shall judge both the not so quick and the brain dead.
But the faithful shall be rewarded with tenure track,
and seated at the right hand of the department chair.
They shall liveth and reigneth as the PI.
Until then thou art commanded to honor thy PI,
but love thy lab manager.
The word of Collins.
Thanks be to Varmus.
The 10 Commandments
-Thou shalt not mansplain
-Thou shalt not fake data, least thee be reported on writedit's blog.
-Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's ESI status.
-Thou shalt not molest the eyes of the audience with the most vengeful powerpoint color scheme.
-Thou shalt not use up the buffer without reordering.
-Thou shalt not pirate software, lest thy need it for a grant proposal due tomorrow. But thou should feel bad if thy do.
-Thou shalt not be the 3rd reviewer.
-Thou shalt not covet false idols such as #K3rn or #N00n4n.
-Thou shalt not apply for an R21 when thou should be applying for an R01 instead.
-Thou shalt not forget to troll Scientopia.