I have two relatives that recently celebrated birthdays and their continued advancement into senility. One of them, Tom, is a well respected scientist and who if you joined the biomedical life sciences game in the past 30 years you possibly used one of his textbooks in your undergraduate training. He has traveled the world, given lectures at Oxford, met with heads of state, and is a fairly beloved old codger in his field.
The other relative is Billy, who is not so well traveled, in fact I think he has only left the state three times. He is off the belief that nothing good happens outside his property line. But you would think a former Merchant Marine would be well traveled and have many stories of exploits. Not Billy, he is actually afraid of water. He joined the Merchant Marine program so as not to be shipped off to Vietnam. In fact I really don't think he could even swim. While Billy never met with diplomats, he did meet with the end of his index finger when trying to dislodge something jamming the blade on his riding lawn mower, WHILE THE ENGINE WAS ENGAGED. Billy also caused the demise of a brand new truck when he was cutting down a dead pine tree. The tree fell across the bed of the truck, crunching the frame, blowing out every single piece of glass on the truck, and rendering it a giant paperweight. Luckily for all of us Billy no longer thinks of himself as an arborist or attempts lawnmower repair these days.
So happy birthday guys and if I had to choose between the two of you, I'd rather drink beer with Billy. Sorry Tom, he's got better stories.